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Wellness

How To Get A Better Sex Life

With the Internet as your gateway, there’s never been a better time than today to find answers to your sex questions, seek advice, and get yourself and your partner excited.

What started out as my own sexual search through Google has now become a worldwide discussion. For myself, it’s been a revelation: I am at last a person who has experienced a variety of sexual partners from more than the few I’ve always had. I’ve found a great deal of comfort and pleasure in experimenting my first time, and the more I do it, the more I’m able to have a variety of experiences—from the more intimate to the more adventurous. I’ve had the good fortune to try various things in the past month alone and have found my sexual desires expanded and deepened, with a great deal of new energy and desire. It is amazing how often a lack of focus can turn such an amazing experience into a huge disappointment; just getting into it can be difficult sometimes. I am a very positive person by nature, but I’ll never say that’s the only aspect of it: I’m excited to try this, to explore the range of what my body’s capabilities can do. That’s not to say I’m not looking to make changes, but I’ve been having an easy time staying open to what my body is capable of.

I’ve also had the most wonderful time using my computer as my gateway to discovering about my sexuality, and now I’m using websites to connect with a variety of people.  This time, I am connecting with people who have similar interests as me, or ones that I know I’m likely to share, including those who are into BDSM, or people who would like to experience being dominated or submissively made happy by someone who truly knows their boundaries. While some people would have had an extremely easy time making me feel good, it’s been interesting to see how the experience has not only changed me for the better, but has opened my eyes to what happens when I open myself up to someone. While some people might find BDSM repulsive and distasteful and try to deny the fact it’s a part of their sexual repertoire, while others might even enjoy it, it’s a matter of choosing what is in your own best interest, and who you want to be attracted to. Being open is about being able to communicate that and not having to feel threatened or embarrassed for who you are and what you do. It’s so easy to feel threatened or embarrassed, with no one to talk to about it, but it’s hard for me to imagine I would feel that way in life, so I’m pleased with how well I’ve dealt with my fears.

One thing I can be proud of, though, is my knowledge of sexual physiology. I’ve read an enormous amount about sex in general, but I believe I’ve understood it best. That’s because there are far more interesting things to explore other than the way humans are meant to have sex. The Internet has given me the chance to explore a wide range of things, and explore them in new ways, if I choose to. I found out about my orgasm by accident during a casual search, but this was because I wanted to have some kind of physical response as part of sex, especially after I thought about how much women get turned on by sexual frustration. I’ve read that there is something called  vaginal  orgasms . It is also believed to be a part of how humans communicate with each other’s vulvas, but there are also various theories about why. There are no words to describe it; there’s just an electric excitement that comes over them as an endorphin rush that makes them feel pleasure and release. It can be very satisfying. The difference is that mine feels much more like a tingling sensation at the genital area, rather than a pulsation over the clitoris or vaginal opening. In the past week, I’ve found that it just wasn’t working out. I’ve tried it twice—the first time being with my husband—and I could not get any response. I had to use a lot of lubricant and push it in harder than I’ve ever done to get it to happen more than twice. As I type this, I’m not sure I’m going to do that again, but for the first time in five years, I had an incredibly pleasurable orgasm.