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Wellness

How To Get Through A Breakup Without Going Crazy

Life is all about learning how and when to ask for help. And to not go crazy.

In order to handle conflict, to not go crazy, we need to recognize when we need support and also learn how to help ourselves without the help. A breakup is not a time to go crazy – it’s another time in life to take your time and listen, to seek advice, to have support and advice.

There’s never a good time to ask for assistance. Sometimes we just have to learn how to support ourselves so that we can better handle our own needs and make the best choice for our own situation. The key is to recognize the signs that you might need help and to then make sure you have the tools to handle it by yourself or with the help of others.

So let’s discuss how you can handle a break up so that you can learn how to handle it on your own without going nuts.

Don’t go to extremes. Don’t make things worse. You’re in charge. And this situation doesn’t have to change your life. It doesn’t even have to change your relationship status.

If it feels like things are going too fast, slow them down. Go slow like I told you not to go crazy. Go slowly, like you want to. Slow your breathing, take a deep breath. Slow your mind, and allow your feelings to calm.

And when you’re ready to resume living life to enjoy yourself again, come back to your self-awareness and your mental health by first getting a handle on the fact that there are other people in a relationship (who may still like you and want to be with you).

This goes in the context of the whole “don’t judge a book by its cover” but it’s more like “don’t make the mistakes a ‘crazy person’ makes” – by seeing through their eyes and learning how to cope better with a situation. We all make mistakes from time to time. Just like we make mistakes in relationships. Let’s just be mindful of mistakes that are actually really harmful to our lives and make our lives better by learning how to deal with them by ourselves.

But you know, it is also important to recognize when the break up was warranted. And just like when you hear an “aha!” moment, you can also start to see that you deserve to have a relationship again.

If you find you have lost contact with the person who “you were meant to be with forever” or you didn’t get the support or attention you were expecting to receive, don’t give in to negative vibes and negative emotions. Give in to them instead by making an intention to give it some more attention and care.

“It is okay to have feelings of regret. But you want to know that regret is the worst, because it will always be around. Because after it settles down, it is a horrible, horrible place to be. You will think back over the past year and think to yourself, “No, that didn’t happen to me. That was a terrible person.” So don’t hold feelings – they just hurt you in the long run. Just hold your peace, and trust that that peace will continue to move you forward.” – Lao Tzu

The Break Up Isn’t Just Over

How you deal with an early separation is not really your business. Not really the life you live or wanted it to be.

You know, I once was in a relationship with a friend to whom I have a deep commitment and love. Then after they broke up, I got really mad about it for about a week-end.