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Wellness

What Would You Do If Your Life Were Cut Short?

When I am faced with choosing between continuing on and dying, I always opt for continuing on. I know that it would hurt so much if I was forced to choose between this life and death. I know many others would too.

But even still, I know that, if forced to choose between this life and death, I will choose to continue on, because I know that it would hurt so much if I was forced to choose between this life and death. I know that others would too, but they would choose to continue on, too. They’re too brave or too strong or too determined for their own good to ever give up. When your family loves you so much, it’s hard for most people to let go. And even though they wish they could turn back time or take the easy way out, they don’t have that option. They’re going to have to do what’s right, what will keep them alive, no matter what.

I know I’m not perfect. I know it’s the only life I’ve ever known. But I know I can do better than what I’m doing now. I want to see you happy, and I love you so much. Even though I know you know I don’t deserve the happiness that you’ve given me, I cannot help but hope that someday you can, and that someday you will make up for what I took so long to give you.                 

 This is a difficult message that I write. As one whose family has suffered the loss of loved ones, and who has seen many loved ones suffer their own, I know that it is often difficult to understand the full horror of suffering that others endure. However, I want to try.

I’m trying to tell you this to try and help you heal. Even though I know you can’t help me, I want you to make it a point to say, “I love you,” as often as you can, for as long as you can. I want you to do this in as many places as possible. Please tell your mom, your dad, whoever you know, and even people you don’t know to say this to each other. We all have to make amends to each other sometime. It’s the only way that true and lasting love can grow between us.

You can tell people to say that to your parents, in front of each other, even if they don’t want to have any contact with you anymore. The pain of the loss of a loved one is sometimes more than we can bear to face on our own, and it’s not the same anymore anyway. Sometimes it takes a stranger to offer comfort.

People always ask if I still love them, or if we’re in a relationship. I really hope that you always think of me as a friend, but you know me too well now to doubt any of that. I have made so many people happy in my life, without a love affair. Sometimes, the fact of loving isn’t enough to keep us together forever.

You can tell your friends this. Tell them that you love them. Tell them that you still are their friend, even though you’re not together anymore. Tell them that they have your back. Tell them that you’ll be there for them if they need a friend. You will be. I will tell my family and my friends and everyone that I’m still just as loyal and loving or still just as happy to be friends with you as I was when we were together.

Don’t give up hope. My friends have told me that I’ll just decide not to be in their lives anymore and they’ll be sad. But I won’t. I’ll be there as you go on living. I’ll always be a friend.                 

I hope that, one day, you’ll want this more than I ever wanted it. I hope that, one day, you’ll say what you said to me on the phone, and I’ll hear your voice through the phone when you’re gone, and know that the only reason that we’re separated isn’t because of me.